Well, the list of symptoms is long and somewhat scary but from all the reading I have been doing there are so many children in foster care, or those who have been adopted that suffer from Attachment Disorder I wanted to post them here:
Symptoms of RAD in Children
Superficially charming and engaging, particularly around strangers or those who they feel they can manipulate
Indiscriminate affection, often to strangers; but not affectionate on parent’s terms
Problems making eye contact, except when angry or lying
A severe need to control everything and everyone; worsens as the child gets older
Hypervigilant
Hyperactive, yet lazy in performing tasks
Argumentative, often over silly or insignificant things
Frequent tantrums or rage, often over trivial issues
Demanding or clingy, often at inappropriate times
Trouble understanding cause and effect
Poor impulse control
Lacks morals, values, and spiritual faith
Little or no empathy; often have not developed a conscience
Cruelty to animals
Lying for no apparent reason
False allegations of abuse
Destructive to property or self
Stealing
Constant chatter; nonsense questions
Abnormal speech patterns; uninterested in learning communication skills
Developmental / Learning delays
Fascination with fire, blood and gore, weapons, evil; will usually make the bad choice
Problems with food; either hoarding it or refusing to eat
Concerned with details, but ignoring the main issues
Few or no long term friends; tend to be loners
Attitude of entitlement and self-importance
Sneaks things without permission even if he could have had them by asking
Triangulation of adults; pitting one against the other
A darkness behind the eyes when raging
list was provided by www.RadKid.org
It is such a scary thing to deal with - and at the same time not always easy to diagnos. Many kids will present as ADHD or something else, but if you have adopted or have a foster child that displays even a few of these symptoms I URGE you to get that child into therapy.
This is not only for the good of the child, but for the good of your family. This disorder can make the most able parent feel inadequate and unable to parent. It can tear a family apart and make the parent who is the object of the RAD feel like less than a person
Monday, August 20, 2007
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Summer Vacation
It sure ain't what is used to be. I remember summer vacation being all fun and games for me. Well, now I konw that it was not all fun and games for my mom, especially if I drove her half as nuts as my darling daughter is driving me. She is bored and can never find a thing to do with herself. All she wants is to watch tv
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Parenting again
Growing up I always assumed that being a parent would be an easy thing to accomplish until my child/children reached puberty and that "rebellious" phase. I couldn't have been more wrong.
Riana is "spirited" at the very least and suffering from ADHD or something else at the most. We are committed to seeing her through all that troubles her and making her well - but it is an UPHILL battle. And there are times that this sweet little girl turns this house into one that sounds like a roller-coaster with her screaming and tantruming. I am learning how to deal with these tantrums and basically to ignore them until she behaves appropriately - but it isn't easy.
For the rest of the world she is a very sweet and well mannered child. We are complimented on her bevahior often. Which makes me feel good, but inwardly I still know how she behaves.
It seems to be about control with her - she wants to make the decisions about everything - and if she doesn't make the decision - well, it is tantrum city.
As I said we are working on it - and someday with all the nurturing, affection and love we are capable of she will work through these issues and the child the rest of the world sees - we will see at all times.....
Riana is "spirited" at the very least and suffering from ADHD or something else at the most. We are committed to seeing her through all that troubles her and making her well - but it is an UPHILL battle. And there are times that this sweet little girl turns this house into one that sounds like a roller-coaster with her screaming and tantruming. I am learning how to deal with these tantrums and basically to ignore them until she behaves appropriately - but it isn't easy.
For the rest of the world she is a very sweet and well mannered child. We are complimented on her bevahior often. Which makes me feel good, but inwardly I still know how she behaves.
It seems to be about control with her - she wants to make the decisions about everything - and if she doesn't make the decision - well, it is tantrum city.
As I said we are working on it - and someday with all the nurturing, affection and love we are capable of she will work through these issues and the child the rest of the world sees - we will see at all times.....
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Manic Mornings
Every morning here is a struggle to get Riana ready for school - she argues with me at every turn and creates simple chaos - although we have a simple to follow routine there are mornings that you can just tell the routine is in jeopardy and today was one of them. It makes me wary of being a stay at home mom for the entire summer. We have started some counseling though and I am positive it will help Riana work through whatever issues she is having.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
MY COVER HAS ARRIVED
Here is the official cover for Mohican Lake... I am beside myself with pleasure
La Pensee
Riana has her open house for La Pensee tonight. Russell most likely won't be going with us as he is working on the other side of the state today. I would like him to be there, but it seems his job keeps him from a lot of the things that I deem important to the family.
I have also contacted a place to get Riana set up in counseling as I really think that she needs it and I am hoping that it will help her relationships with everyone, not just the animosity she feels towards me.
I have also contacted a place to get Riana set up in counseling as I really think that she needs it and I am hoping that it will help her relationships with everyone, not just the animosity she feels towards me.
Neglecting My Blog
I have once again gotten so wrapped up in absolutely nothing that I have been ignoring my blog. Mohican Lake is waiting for it's cover-art to come in from PA and the wait is nearly killing me. But I do have a few random thoughts about those things that are driving me crazy.....
How can I learn to have paitence in all aspects of my life, when it was once of the virtues I was born without......
How can I be a great and effective parent to a child who does not care, or have the slighest regard for anything I say....
How can we teach this child to become an upstanding member of society.....
How can a foster parent help but fall in love with a baby they have nurtured from their release from the hospital, especially when said child could be going back to their bio parents.........
Are depression, medicinal eating, binge eating and anxiety the cause of my health/weight problems - or are my weight problems the casue of my depression, medicinal and binge eating and anxiety.....hmmmmmmmmm
How can I learn to have paitence in all aspects of my life, when it was once of the virtues I was born without......
How can I be a great and effective parent to a child who does not care, or have the slighest regard for anything I say....
How can we teach this child to become an upstanding member of society.....
How can a foster parent help but fall in love with a baby they have nurtured from their release from the hospital, especially when said child could be going back to their bio parents.........
Are depression, medicinal eating, binge eating and anxiety the cause of my health/weight problems - or are my weight problems the casue of my depression, medicinal and binge eating and anxiety.....hmmmmmmmmm
Monday, May 7, 2007
Four Month Check up
Well, Twan had his 4 mo check up and I am pleased to say that he is now officially "on the charts" - the growth charts that is
He is 12 lb 6 oz, head 41 cm, and 24 1/4 inches long. He is on the growth chart for all 3 - 25th percentile for head, 10th percentile for length, and 5th for weight. It is good that he is there so soon - dr. told us that they give preemies until they are 2 to make it onto the charts - but Twan has done it already
He has also reached all the milestones for his "adjusted" age and many for his "actual" ago - really the only one is that he doesn't do is reach for an item that is held in front of him. He bats things away, but doesn't reach - yet
He is 12 lb 6 oz, head 41 cm, and 24 1/4 inches long. He is on the growth chart for all 3 - 25th percentile for head, 10th percentile for length, and 5th for weight. It is good that he is there so soon - dr. told us that they give preemies until they are 2 to make it onto the charts - but Twan has done it already
He has also reached all the milestones for his "adjusted" age and many for his "actual" ago - really the only one is that he doesn't do is reach for an item that is held in front of him. He bats things away, but doesn't reach - yet
Parenting
So, Russell and I have been parents to Riana for almost a year and half now, unofficially and officially for a little over a year - and there are times I realize we were not prepared to be instant parents to a little girl who most likely suffered a lot in her very young years.
She and I butt heads on everything - and really a five year old shouldn't be butting heads with her mother. Talked to the dr. again on Saturday when we were there for Twan's 4 mo check up - and she said that we should get "the explosive child" it's a book. These explosions only happen for me though, so I am thinking there is some kind of a problem.
Now, if I think back she hasn't had any real "mother" figures in her life that I can think of - the time she spent with bio mom couldn't have been quality as I know that her older sister was taking care of her, and she was only ten at the time. Time with the foster parent didn't seem to have a real strong mother figure in the household - and I wonder if she was the victim of favoritism there.
So, possibly my "strong" personality and her need to take care of herself are what is causing the clashes - I am willing to try anything to make it more peaceful here - because before we know it she will be a teenager and there will be no peace at all......
She and I butt heads on everything - and really a five year old shouldn't be butting heads with her mother. Talked to the dr. again on Saturday when we were there for Twan's 4 mo check up - and she said that we should get "the explosive child" it's a book. These explosions only happen for me though, so I am thinking there is some kind of a problem.
Now, if I think back she hasn't had any real "mother" figures in her life that I can think of - the time she spent with bio mom couldn't have been quality as I know that her older sister was taking care of her, and she was only ten at the time. Time with the foster parent didn't seem to have a real strong mother figure in the household - and I wonder if she was the victim of favoritism there.
So, possibly my "strong" personality and her need to take care of herself are what is causing the clashes - I am willing to try anything to make it more peaceful here - because before we know it she will be a teenager and there will be no peace at all......
Friday, May 4, 2007
Feeling Fulfilled
Just needed to write about this while the feeling is fresh in my mind -
Was just shopping at Wal-Mart (of couse) and was inline waiting to check out when I heard a voice that I knew sounded familiar to me. As I looked up to see the source of the voice the person attached to it looked up at the same time. It was Shante - she was one of our foster daughter's - she was 16 at the time and pregnant.
She only stayed a short time, but while she was here she was part of the family and I admit that I have missed her since we lost contact. She was so happy to see me, as happy as I was. She is living right up the road now and has completed high school and is taking nursing classes.
She told me that we will never know how much of an impact we had on her life - we got her to go back to school and not become a statistic in the system that she was once a cog in.
She is supposed to visit and I feel like there is something good I have done in this world - for her to think so highly of us still after over a year.....
Was just shopping at Wal-Mart (of couse) and was inline waiting to check out when I heard a voice that I knew sounded familiar to me. As I looked up to see the source of the voice the person attached to it looked up at the same time. It was Shante - she was one of our foster daughter's - she was 16 at the time and pregnant.
She only stayed a short time, but while she was here she was part of the family and I admit that I have missed her since we lost contact. She was so happy to see me, as happy as I was. She is living right up the road now and has completed high school and is taking nursing classes.
She told me that we will never know how much of an impact we had on her life - we got her to go back to school and not become a statistic in the system that she was once a cog in.
She is supposed to visit and I feel like there is something good I have done in this world - for her to think so highly of us still after over a year.....
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Waiting is the Hardest Part
It has been a bit over 10 days since I sent my edited manuscript to PA and received a response that it was being sent to formatting. I grow more and more impaitent each day that I don't receive a thing from them. I am anxious to see my book in print.
With that and the MANY other things that are stressing my to the hilt lately I am not sure how much longer I can keep my cool and my sanity in place
With that and the MANY other things that are stressing my to the hilt lately I am not sure how much longer I can keep my cool and my sanity in place
Thursday, April 26, 2007
A Serendipitious Meeting
Ok, so my book is being published by Publish America and they have message boards for the authors to talk, kibbitz, etc. A fellow author was looking for a review of her work, and I volunteered if she would review Mohican Lake in return. She agreed and we began.
Nancy Lindley-Gauthier's soon to be published book "A Case of Over-Kill" is well worh the read and a great mystery. She gave Mohican Lake a stellar review as well - you can read it on www.freewebs.com/mauraclegg.
After the reviews were done we were chit-chatting - both books are set in NH and we both grew up in MA. I told her that I grew up in North Reading, and her response... get ready - she grew up in NR too. Very strange......
Shows that you are never too far from your home town...at least if you are from North Reading you aren't
Nancy Lindley-Gauthier's soon to be published book "A Case of Over-Kill" is well worh the read and a great mystery. She gave Mohican Lake a stellar review as well - you can read it on www.freewebs.com/mauraclegg.
After the reviews were done we were chit-chatting - both books are set in NH and we both grew up in MA. I told her that I grew up in North Reading, and her response... get ready - she grew up in NR too. Very strange......
Shows that you are never too far from your home town...at least if you are from North Reading you aren't
Monday, April 23, 2007
Authors Den
I have to say I didn't realize the size of the community of authors out there on the interst. There are so many of us with the same dream - to share our work with the world.
I just joined authors den and it is a wonderful place to read and meet new authors. I am looking forward to a great time there.
I have posted a couple of my older articles there to share with the community and have received some positive feedback.
It is a great feeling
I just joined authors den and it is a wonderful place to read and meet new authors. I am looking forward to a great time there.
I have posted a couple of my older articles there to share with the community and have received some positive feedback.
It is a great feeling
Bringing Sisters Together
We went this past weekend and brought Riana to meet up with her 2 sisters for the first time in many years. Ashley is in the front and is 15, Alyssa is in the back with Riana and she is 13. They all look so much alike, but by looking at Alyssa we can see what Riana will look like when she gets older - except the other 2 girls have wavy/curly hair and Riana's is pin straight.
It was an interesting visit once I got over my initial nerves. The girls both are lovely and seemed to be very happy to have Riana back in their lives and I am glad that we did it.
We are looking forward to continuing the relationship so the girls will have each other for as long as they want.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Nothing New
Really, nothing new has happened.
Antoine's OTC was sustained in court the beginning of the week, so no changes there.
Riana is on vacation this week, so she is home with me and we have had at least 1 good day. I am realizing that the is a "spirited child" and I am going to read the book recommended to my by her doctor to help us to understand her better.
I finished the edit on Mohican Lake early this week with the help of Pleshette and Russell (yes, Russell helped me out A LOT). So, now I am waiting for the next phase of publication to begin.
Just joined www.authorsden.com - another resource for writers & readers
Antoine's OTC was sustained in court the beginning of the week, so no changes there.
Riana is on vacation this week, so she is home with me and we have had at least 1 good day. I am realizing that the is a "spirited child" and I am going to read the book recommended to my by her doctor to help us to understand her better.
I finished the edit on Mohican Lake early this week with the help of Pleshette and Russell (yes, Russell helped me out A LOT). So, now I am waiting for the next phase of publication to begin.
Just joined www.authorsden.com - another resource for writers & readers
Monday, April 9, 2007
Easter
We got all dressed up and went out to dinner with my mom Saturday night for our pre-Easter dinner since mom was working all weekend. Riana and Antoine both looked almost too cute for words.
Thursday, April 5, 2007
News on Mohican Lake
The publishing journey seems to be moving along a but quicker than I assumed. Mohican Lake has already been assigned an ISBN number and it is being sent back to me so I can check it for necessary editing - after that is completed it'll be about 6-8 weeks until publication.......
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Parent Teacher Conf
Well, the second round of parent teacher conferences went off without a hitch. We knew Riana was doing well academically, and still having some minor behavioral problems; this is exactly what we discussed with her teacher during the meeting.
I am wondering if some of the problems stem from where she lived before she was a part of our family and if the instability when she was younger plays a roll.
On the lighter side - she is going to be published in a district wide creative writing book in the city for a very short story she wrote for class. There will be an awards ceremony and she will receive a copy of the book as well.
Also, the teacher recommended an accelerated school for her next year. I have filled out the application and have to give a bit of it to her teacher to fill out and then she will be part of the lottery for that. It is a school focused on literature and I think it is something she would enjoy.
I am wondering if some of the problems stem from where she lived before she was a part of our family and if the instability when she was younger plays a roll.
On the lighter side - she is going to be published in a district wide creative writing book in the city for a very short story she wrote for class. There will be an awards ceremony and she will receive a copy of the book as well.
Also, the teacher recommended an accelerated school for her next year. I have filled out the application and have to give a bit of it to her teacher to fill out and then she will be part of the lottery for that. It is a school focused on literature and I think it is something she would enjoy.
Monday, March 26, 2007
Riana's Award Ceremony
Riana had her second award ceremony of the year today at school, and for the second time she received an academic award of scholarship - last time for reading, this time for language arts and math. SHe is one smart cookie - too smart sometimes I think
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Publish America
Days ago I wrote that my manuscript has been accepted by Publish America and that I was beyond excited that I was FINALLY going to see my work in print for the general public. I thought of going other routes, www.booksurge.com was one them, as was my search for an agent to represent my work.
I did find an agent at one point, but they did nothing but cost me money and depress me. I have learned that acquiring an agent is not something that is easy - agents are subjective about what work they choose to represent. Most of it by their own opinions and not all agents like all work.
I have read, and appreciate the comments left to me by many about Publish America - but I have found positive about them as well. I am happy with my decision. Even if they are a so-called "vanity publisher" then they are working towards increasing my own vanity and my friends and family will be able to buy and enjoy my first novel in print.
Will this take me on to becoming a "mainstream" author? Only God know that for sure, but I know that it is a first step and one that I am committed to - just aws I am committed to my free lance work on Helium and Suite101.
I will be an author - in the mainstream. It is what I am destined for and no amount of negativity will ever stop me from reaching this goal.
I did find an agent at one point, but they did nothing but cost me money and depress me. I have learned that acquiring an agent is not something that is easy - agents are subjective about what work they choose to represent. Most of it by their own opinions and not all agents like all work.
I have read, and appreciate the comments left to me by many about Publish America - but I have found positive about them as well. I am happy with my decision. Even if they are a so-called "vanity publisher" then they are working towards increasing my own vanity and my friends and family will be able to buy and enjoy my first novel in print.
Will this take me on to becoming a "mainstream" author? Only God know that for sure, but I know that it is a first step and one that I am committed to - just aws I am committed to my free lance work on Helium and Suite101.
I will be an author - in the mainstream. It is what I am destined for and no amount of negativity will ever stop me from reaching this goal.
Friday, March 23, 2007
Out of my hands
Publish America sent me my new author questionaire on Monday and I spent most of the week filling it out - they needed simple stuff, my name, the name I want on the book, dedication, scknowledgements, a list of names/addresses to send flyers too when publication is imminent - I asked more people than I got responses from - but, I will resend an email to EVERYONE I know when the book can be purchased and where it can be purchased. maybe this is the beginning of something wonderful
I am starting to get a good feeling about the whole thing, but I am still not convinced that is is real......
I am starting to get a good feeling about the whole thing, but I am still not convinced that is is real......
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Sick Kid
Kept Riana home from school the last two days - she has had a fever, headache and I am terrified that she has the chicken pox - I know it is going around in her class. So far though, so spots anywhere......
Monday, March 12, 2007
My publishing journey begins
My contract from Publish America arrived on Saturday and I signed it mailed it back Priority Mail today. It was Twan's first visit to a post office.
As soon as they get the contract back in their office and process it I should hear about them to begin the pre-production stuff (editing, etc) to get Mohican Lake ready for publication.
I am still not all that excited yet, I want to bide my time until I am sure that things will really happen this time.
Although, I am excited for the first time I am able to hold my published novel in my hands. :-)
As soon as they get the contract back in their office and process it I should hear about them to begin the pre-production stuff (editing, etc) to get Mohican Lake ready for publication.
I am still not all that excited yet, I want to bide my time until I am sure that things will really happen this time.
Although, I am excited for the first time I am able to hold my published novel in my hands. :-)
Tuesday, March 6, 2007
My Manuscript
Just had to blog this - it is good news
www.publishamerica.com has offered to publish Mohican Lake.
Yes, it's true. I will be a published author soon. My dream is coming true.
Now I need to begin work on the sequel - The Masterful Mohican
www.publishamerica.com has offered to publish Mohican Lake.
Yes, it's true. I will be a published author soon. My dream is coming true.
Now I need to begin work on the sequel - The Masterful Mohican
Friday, March 2, 2007
Publish America
I was looking through a message board on www.helium.com today and found a publishing house that doesn't require representation to publish a novel. I checked them out and there is no up front cost to me - the destitute author, so I immediately submitted Mohican Lake to them.
I have had so very many rejections from agents, and had a lot of time wasted by one I was contracted to for a year, that I am hoping that now is my time. The website is www.publishamerica.com and I am hoping that they want to publish the novel for me.
If they do it will be for sale on www.amazon.com and www.barnesandnoble.com and I can do some self publicitiy and try and get signings booked at book stores around here - as well as submitting press releases to the local papers. If it happens I would even try and have something published up in MA since that is where I am from.
The royalities look good from there too - now, let's just keep our fingers and toes crossed that they like the manuscript and want to publish it for me.
I have had so very many rejections from agents, and had a lot of time wasted by one I was contracted to for a year, that I am hoping that now is my time. The website is www.publishamerica.com and I am hoping that they want to publish the novel for me.
If they do it will be for sale on www.amazon.com and www.barnesandnoble.com and I can do some self publicitiy and try and get signings booked at book stores around here - as well as submitting press releases to the local papers. If it happens I would even try and have something published up in MA since that is where I am from.
The royalities look good from there too - now, let's just keep our fingers and toes crossed that they like the manuscript and want to publish it for me.
Two Month Check-up
Took Twan (Antoine) to the dr. today for his 2 month check up and first shots. The shots were painful for us both and he cried the loudest I have heard from him.
He is doing great though and is now 8 lbs 6 oz and 21 in
He is doing great though and is now 8 lbs 6 oz and 21 in
Thursday, March 1, 2007
Stay at Home Mom
Well, being a stay at home mom to an infant is kind of boring, although I am relishing the quiet in the wake of Patrick and Jason's departure. Russell thinks it is the perfect opportunity for me to keep the house clean - personally I think he is nuts. Martha Stewart I am not. My housekeeping skills run more along the line of Peg Bundy.
Antoine is not at that fun stage yet, althogh we have seen a few spontaneous smiles from him. He is wide eyes and makes a real cute owl face that I have to try and get a picture of.
Riana is loving the fact that the boys are gone. She has her room back and is getting is a lot less trouble. If I could only get her to stop stealing my make-up she would almost be perfect. I found 6 or 7 of my eyeliners in her backpack yesterday and we too shocked to do much of anything about it.
She wants to grow up so fast; wants to wear make-up, wants a boyfriend and most of all wants to need to wear a bra. She even has her first crush on my friend Marc. You can tell by how she tries to flirt with him - keep in mind she is only 5............ Russell and I are certainly going to have our hand full with her when she gets older........ good thing he has no hair cause he would be pulling it out soon enough.....
Antoine is not at that fun stage yet, althogh we have seen a few spontaneous smiles from him. He is wide eyes and makes a real cute owl face that I have to try and get a picture of.
Riana is loving the fact that the boys are gone. She has her room back and is getting is a lot less trouble. If I could only get her to stop stealing my make-up she would almost be perfect. I found 6 or 7 of my eyeliners in her backpack yesterday and we too shocked to do much of anything about it.
She wants to grow up so fast; wants to wear make-up, wants a boyfriend and most of all wants to need to wear a bra. She even has her first crush on my friend Marc. You can tell by how she tries to flirt with him - keep in mind she is only 5............ Russell and I are certainly going to have our hand full with her when she gets older........ good thing he has no hair cause he would be pulling it out soon enough.....
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Patrick and Jason
Patrick and Jason moved out last Thursday morning.
It is sad, but not sad at the same time. They are moving in with an aunt who loves them very much and has already been providing for them their whole lives. She is happy to have them and Patrick is happy to be back with his sister.
For our part - it was sad to lose a big part of our family, but at the same time it is kind of a relief. Four kids was just too much for me and some of the behaviors that were happening here were just too much.
Riana is happy too, she has her old room back, and no one is breaking her toys anymore.
It is sad, but not sad at the same time. They are moving in with an aunt who loves them very much and has already been providing for them their whole lives. She is happy to have them and Patrick is happy to be back with his sister.
For our part - it was sad to lose a big part of our family, but at the same time it is kind of a relief. Four kids was just too much for me and some of the behaviors that were happening here were just too much.
Riana is happy too, she has her old room back, and no one is breaking her toys anymore.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Helium
I have found a site where "free-lance" writers like myself can publish work, and have it rated by their peers, as well as make a small stipend for their troubles. It is www.helium.com, and I just joined towards the end of last week but I have found it loads better than my original free lance site www.triond.com.
There is a community message board area where there is a broad array of topics to post to, and you also have the ability to rate articles against each other. You also have the ability to "leap-frog" or re-post an article that you have already written and may not be doing well in the standings as you would like.
Personally I just rewrote one that was 19th of 44 - which is not acceptable to me. I went back and tried to make the article more organized and enjoyable to anyone who was reading/rating it. I sure hope it does better, because I would like to at least be in the top 10. Okay, I would like to be number 1 for all of my articles, but I know that I am not the worlds best writer, and the rating as subjective, so I could be happy with the top 10........
There is a community message board area where there is a broad array of topics to post to, and you also have the ability to rate articles against each other. You also have the ability to "leap-frog" or re-post an article that you have already written and may not be doing well in the standings as you would like.
Personally I just rewrote one that was 19th of 44 - which is not acceptable to me. I went back and tried to make the article more organized and enjoyable to anyone who was reading/rating it. I sure hope it does better, because I would like to at least be in the top 10. Okay, I would like to be number 1 for all of my articles, but I know that I am not the worlds best writer, and the rating as subjective, so I could be happy with the top 10........
Tuesday, February 6, 2007
A Crack in My Facade
So, early last night the kids finally did it, they broke me..... I called my husband crying my eyes out because my 5 year old wouldn't stop stomping her feet and screaming at me at the top of her lungs. I am really at a loss what to do with her (I am still waiting for the book recommended by the doctor). Her screaming is driving me insane - and it also let's Patrick think that it is ok to talk to me like that and he began yesterday morning yelling at me and also trying to take a swing at me. I am not going to be hit by and kids though and I can dodge him. I was definitely crying my eyes out though, feelings hurt and just spent.
Taking care of four kids all day is not all that it's cracked up to be - I mean I can't even take a few minutes to take a shower. If I do I never know where I will find my 3 year old when I get out. And all he wants to do is eat all day long and cries (loud and long) if I tell him he has to wait even 5 minutes before he has something to eat.
The babies are not all that much trouble, it is just that there are two of them and they both need attention at the same time. Well, not really, but if Jason sees that I am spending time with Antoine he gets upset and starts to cry. I have become rather adept at holding them both though - even though Jason reaches out for Antoine and I have to help him to keep his hands to himself......
Here's hoping today is a better day
Taking care of four kids all day is not all that it's cracked up to be - I mean I can't even take a few minutes to take a shower. If I do I never know where I will find my 3 year old when I get out. And all he wants to do is eat all day long and cries (loud and long) if I tell him he has to wait even 5 minutes before he has something to eat.
The babies are not all that much trouble, it is just that there are two of them and they both need attention at the same time. Well, not really, but if Jason sees that I am spending time with Antoine he gets upset and starts to cry. I have become rather adept at holding them both though - even though Jason reaches out for Antoine and I have to help him to keep his hands to himself......
Here's hoping today is a better day
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
A Leanrning Experience
So, yesterday I had to take my youngest to the doctor for a check up, basically a weigh-in. He is now 6 lbs 6 oz and 20 inches long and the doctor is more than satisfied with his growth. Since I was at the office, and Antoine's doctor is also Riana's doctor I decided to ask her about Riana's recent obnoxious, and unacceptable behavior.
Dr. Frost has known Riana for most if not all of her life and I thought she would be the best one to ask how I can curb this behavior because as Lisa and Jolene have seen it is beyond words.
She gave me a few ideas for rewarding her good behavior, however small and then laughed and gave me a piece of advice. "My dear," she said with a twinkle in her eye, "You need to read a book called Parenting The Spirited Child"
Needless to say I ordered the book at www.amazon.com last night and I am anxiously awaiting its arrival. Unfortunately I took the cheap way out and went for super saver (free) shipping and will have to wait or week or more for the book - but I can't wait til it gets here........
Dr. Frost has known Riana for most if not all of her life and I thought she would be the best one to ask how I can curb this behavior because as Lisa and Jolene have seen it is beyond words.
She gave me a few ideas for rewarding her good behavior, however small and then laughed and gave me a piece of advice. "My dear," she said with a twinkle in her eye, "You need to read a book called Parenting The Spirited Child"
Needless to say I ordered the book at www.amazon.com last night and I am anxiously awaiting its arrival. Unfortunately I took the cheap way out and went for super saver (free) shipping and will have to wait or week or more for the book - but I can't wait til it gets here........
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Time and not enough of it
I don't understand where all my time goes - well, actually I do. With 4 kids in the house and 2 of them infants I don't have time to do much of anything. I haven't written or posted an article on Triond since before Antoine came. I need to start back up writing so I don't get rusty
Friday, January 26, 2007
Antoine
Here's a link to a new album of pictures of Antoine. Lisa M came over today and shot these for me with her digital camera.... I have taken some as well, but they are on 35mm film and I have to wait to get them developed....
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
No Time
Well, I thought I had to time to myself before with three kids in the house, but now that there are four I barely have time to go to the bathroom - let alone have any time to even take a quiet minute to think. Both of the babies are on the same schedule 8/12/4/8/12 - well, Jason doesn't do the middle of the night feedings, he goes to bed around 8 at night, but Antoine is up every four hours like clockwork. It can be tough at that time, you have to decide which one of them can wait to eat. Jason thinks that he needs to eat first, and it is urgent for him. He has to keep up his 25+ pound frame - and at 6 months old it's not that tough - he doesn't move around all that much yet. Even though he is getting real good at rolling around on the floor to get where he wants to get in the room
Antoine is getting bigger and bigger by the day. He was weighed today, and he is now 6 lbs and 1/2 oz. I am proud of both him and us for getting his weight up there. Before you know if he will be the same weight as a full term baby. He is getting more alert now, and wants to stay awake for longer periods of time.
But, my person space and privacy are GONE. But it is not as hard as I thought it would be. The babies keep me busy and I am actually enjoying myself. Not sure if it is just because I have lost my mind, or that I have found something that I am really good at.......
Antoine is getting bigger and bigger by the day. He was weighed today, and he is now 6 lbs and 1/2 oz. I am proud of both him and us for getting his weight up there. Before you know if he will be the same weight as a full term baby. He is getting more alert now, and wants to stay awake for longer periods of time.
But, my person space and privacy are GONE. But it is not as hard as I thought it would be. The babies keep me busy and I am actually enjoying myself. Not sure if it is just because I have lost my mind, or that I have found something that I am really good at.......
Crying and SIck Kids
I am so sick of litle kids with runny noses!! The boys have been sick with colds 3 or 4 times since moving in and they always work their way through the house - they get sick on the visits with their parents and bring the germs right home. Here's hoping Riana doesn't get sick
Sunday, January 14, 2007
The Three F's
We had a get together with 3 other couples last night (Lara and Jason, Derek and Debie, and Greg and Stefania) and it was wonderful to be able to spend some time with good friends and have some great adult conversation. The girls kicked butt at Totally 80's Trivial Pursuit!!! It is great to have friends that can come over and enjoy a nice evening with you - food, friends and fun. Those are the three F's I have to remember to concentrate on :-)
Saturday, January 13, 2007
A New Addition
We found out this week that Patrick and Jason, our two foster sons will soon be moving on to live with new family who is practically family to them, the news was devasting, but kind of expected. That same afternoon I received a call from DCF to see if we would be interested in bringing a newborn into our home straight from the hospital - of course, we said yes - and last night we welcomed Antoine into the home. He is a wee baby, 5 lbs, 4 ozs. He was born a bit premature 12/21 - but he has already gained a pound since being born and has no other issues that are known at this point.
We are looking forward to some fun times watching Antoine grow into the newborn clothes I picked up for him yesterday.
We are looking forward to some fun times watching Antoine grow into the newborn clothes I picked up for him yesterday.
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
First Snow
We had our first snowfall in New Britain, CT today, it really wasn't much more than a flurry - but Patrick was excited to see it - he really wanted to put on his boots and go out and play in it. There definitely wasn't enought for that. It was gone soon after it started with no sign of it left now several hours later
Links and such
I just added some www.amazon.com links to my blog. I love amazon - I order and pre-order all the books from my favorite author's there. It is like Christmas when a book that I have pre-ordered arrives in the mailbox. Also, when I self-publish my book Mohican Lake withing the next few months through www.booksurge.com it will be available for purchase right there. Check 'em out and buy your books there, they certainly have the best prices
Monday, January 8, 2007
My Manuscript
In addition to now raising 3 children I am also looking for an agent to represent my completed manuscript. It is tough being rejected by people on a whim and they all tell me that being an agent is subjective work, but it is disheartening for me - as the author - to see "thanks, but no thanks" come back from a query I have sent out. I have decided to post the first few chapters of my manuscript here in my blog, so that anyone who takes the time to read the blog can also read the first few chapters of my manuscript and give me some feedback. thanks
and here it is....
***
When I received a certified letter from a law firm, I’ll admit I didn’t really feel the need to run to the post office and pick it up. I mean certified letters never carry good news, and they usually end up costing you a lot of money. The next morning I grudgingly went to the post office and I picked up the letter sent by the law firm of Goodman, Smith and Meyers and I stuffed it in my purse to read later. I went off to work at AmeriCable where I was employed as a call center lead, which is a real fancy word for upper level grunt. I had slightly more responsibility than the average operator, but miles less than the regular supervisors. As a matter of fact, I completed the work that the supervisors deem to be below them. Rumors had been running rampant that our call center will soon be closing its doors due to a recent merger with a larger, regional cable company. Honestly, I wasn’t worried much about that. I could always go back to waiting tables if necessary. What bills do I have anyway? I live on my parent’s property, in the pool house if you must know. I have a private entrance, and I don’t see them unless I’m summoned. My pool house is small but comfortable. I have the necessary kitchen, living room, bedroom, closets and bathroom, and honestly if I was renting somewhere I would pay mucho dinero for a place as nice as the pool house.
I was on my lunch break when I decided that I had nothing better to do than to open the letter from the lawyers. With great trepidation I held the letter up to the light; I was unable to spy anything through the thick grain of the envelope and enclosed stationary. I took a deep breath made sure no one was around and tore open the offending piece of mail.
“Dear Ms. O’Malley,” the letter began Ms. O’Malley is me, Madigan O’Malley. “It’s with much sadness that we must inform you of the passing of Madeline Ahearn, your great, great aunt.” My what? I don’t know anything about a great, great aunt or that there was one who was still alive and had recently passed. The letter continued, “In her last will and testament, Miss Ahearn has left you’re her life’s work, a small resort hotel on the Mohican Lake in New Hampshire.” She left me what? Who is she? What is this all about? My brain was on full overload. I knew that I shouldn’t have read the letter until I was safely ensconced in my quaint pool house living room. I panicked over the letter immediately that then went barging into my manager’s office
“Yes, Madigan,” My manager Lois asked as she looked down her nose at me when I took a set.
“Lois, I need to leave, I am, um, I have a, I am, um.” I just stammered at her not really sure what to say,
“Madigan, I am busy here, what is the problem.”“Um, I need to leave,” I couldn’t give her an explanation because I wasn’t really sure what was going on.
Lois clicked her mouse a couple of times, looking, I assumed, at the schedule and the projected calls and the calls that we had received that day,” Fine, you can go.”
I yelled a quick thanks as I ran to my desk, clocked out and ran out of the office, not even stopping when my friend, Karen, started asking me what was going on and where I was going.
I called my mother as soon as I got into my car and told her that I needed to speak with her as soon as I could get home, “Mother I wouldn’t bother you if it wasn’t important.”
“Darling, as long as you can get here quickly we can talk. I have an appointment this morning that cannot be broken.” My mother told me in no uncertain terms.
“Mother, I promise you I’ll be there as soon as I can” I told her, I wasn’t kidding either; I was breaking the land speed record to get home.
“Fine, Madigan. I’ll see you in the sunroom when you arrive,”
I realized that my mother was going to be unhappy with my Harvard sweatshirt and ripped jeans, but for heaven’s sake, I was 26 years old, and I knew how to dress, and I knew what was appropriate and what is not for my job. She was going to have to deal with it. I had much more important fish to fry!
Mrs. O’Leary opened the door for me as I approached and told me that Mother would see me in the sunroom. Mrs. O’Leary asked if I would like some refreshment.
“No thank you Mrs. O., but you might want to have a glass ready for my mother when I am through with her,” the last part of this comment was muttered under my breath.
The unflappable Mrs. O’Leary caught it though, “Yes, Ms. Madigan.”
I walked out to the sunroom and glimpsed my mother standing by the French doors wearing a spring green linen suit and talking on the phone.
“Yes, Clint, I am aware that I have a fund-raiser. I am about to find out why your daughter demanded that I see her before I leave, I am hoping it is not another of her hare-brained ideas.”
“Yes, Clint, I’ll make sure Irene has a menu prepared for dinner tonight with the Larsons.”
Yes, Clint, I’ll make sure that Madigan is aware that the dress this evening is semi-formal,” As this was said my mother took a look at my current attire and rolled her eyes in disgust.
With that last dig in my direction, Mother hung up the phone and gave me her full attention. I wonder if she was really on the phone at all!
“Now Madigan darling, what is this all about?” Mother asked
I handed her the letter, which was wrinkled and damp with sweat, and began peppering her with questions before she could read the letter in its entirety. “Do you know this Madeline Ahearn?” “Are we related to her?” “What in this all about and why am I the beneficiary of this hotel?” Mother continued to check over the letter and make sounds like she may be interested, or at least curious about the letter. She didn’t respond to any of my questions, but went to the phone and dialed Father’s office number and began speaking in a hushed tone. I tried to move a little closer so that I could hear what she was saying, but one look got me sit back in my chair. I tired to move towards my mother again and her look got me to move to a couch on the other side of the room while she finished her conversation with my father.
“Now Madigan,” Mother began, “What I have to tell you may be somewhat of a shock”
Oh boy, what was she going to tell me, that I was adopted, or that I was kidnapped as a child and this Ahearn clan was my true family?
“Madigan, when you were young we had a wonderful relationship with some members of Father’s family. There was a falling out at some point, that I am not even truly aware of the origins of, but I know that from that point forward, your Father didn’t contact anyone from his family. Seems that Madeline was a favorite Great-Aunt of your father, and it was her company that he missed the most of all. Your father used to summer at Lake Mohican with Madeline each and every summer and those are times that he still talks about fondly. It was his love for her that made him adamant that your name be close to hers. Madeline attempted to contact your father several times over the years, but he felt that by talking to her, he would be giving in.”
“Mother, I know that we didn’t have much contact with Father’s family. I know that I have never heard him talk about anyone from his family. And why in the name of good sense, would this woman, whom I don’t know, leave me a hotel?”
“Madigan, darling, Madeline must have felt that by giving you the place that your father loved so much that this was her way of letting him know that he was always a part of her heart.”
“But, Mother, what am I going to do with a hotel?”
“Madigan, I know that you don’t like you job. Why don’t you call this lawyer and set up an appointment. See what the property looks like, what shape it is in, and the value of the bequest.”
“If you say so Mother, I’ll call the law office when I get back to my house, and I’ll let you and father know what I am going to do, when I figure it out myself.”
I stomped out to the pool house, in a conundrum to say the very least. Did I really want to get involved in all the politics of Father’s family? Did I care to find out about Great Aunt Madeline? Did I know thing one about running a resort hotel? Not really, not really sure, and definitely not. Those were the answers that I gave myself, yet as I walked in the house and set my things down I inexplicably found myself dialing the phone to call the law firm of Dewey, Cheatem and Howe, this was how I was planning on referring to the firm of Goodman, Smith and Myers. I thought that this had to be a huge mistake or a scam to get some money out of me. They were in for a great big nothing if they thought they could get anything from me, I lived paycheck to paycheck and had nothing left over for a scam.
The snob of a lawyer, Goodman I believe I was told his name was, told me that I was the proud owner of the Masterful Mohican Resort Hotel and Cabins, and also a large bequest of funds. As this lawyer was speaking I was doodling on a pad of paper, drawing flowers and hearts and when I heard bequest I started drawing dollar signs and a house. Hmmmmmm, I thought, a large bequest, could there be the opportunity for me to move out of Mother’s pool house?
I asked Goodman, or Cheatem as I decided he must be, if he could explain in further detail to me over the telephone. He stated that he would rather meet in person and show me all the details and also show me the hotel. I told him that I was not working the next day, anymore I thought, and asked what time I could see him. I was told that we could meet at eleven the next morning, for an early lunch.
I hopped in my Durango at seven the next morning, gassed up the truck and grabbed an extra large coffee for the trip. Mohican Lake was in northern New Hampshire, not quite as north Canada, but damn close. The ride took me about three hours; luckily I had left about four hours early, since I can’t stand to be late. I found the law office not as auspicious as I thought it would be. Actually, it was more Victorian Mansion, than cold steel and concrete. Mr. Goodman approached, or at least I hoped it was Mr. Goodman. Wow! What a good man, about 6’4” and from what I could see not an ounce of fat on him. And there was not suit on this man. He was in a tight fitting pair of jeans, and a hooded sweatshirt. Instant lust!! Snap out of it Madigan, I scolded myself, you know he will turn out to be a pompous, arrogant man.
We shook hands and I nearly swooned. Honestly, I have never swooned in my entire life, nor had I uttered the word swooned, until I laid eyes on him. I certainly hoped that Mr. Goodman, Taylor, thought that my hands were clammy and shaking from too much coffee and not from the jolt of sexual attraction that I just was struck with. He made some small talk, telling me about my great aunt and how she had been with the law firm since his father hung out his shingle over forty years ago. I assumed then that my great aunt had been quite old, ninety-two I found out. She lived on her own for her whole life and ran the hotel until the beginning season when a broken hip laid her up. One of the locals took over the hotel for the season, and nearly ran it into the ground without Madeline. Unfortunately, when they attempted the surgery to replace her hip she was too weak to withstand it. Taylor thought it was from a broken heart, since she knew that her hotel was quickly falling into disrepair. Not only that, but her reputation was failing as well. Many of the tourists that year were unhappy with the Masterful Mohican, the true name of the hotel. The “manager” actually took off with all the profits; basically he tried to run the hotel into the ground.
We were talking as we walked into his office was beautiful in a masculine way, all dark, warm wood for the furniture and a mossy green on the walls. It looked like a sanctuary, the desk was large, but not overly so and the walls were covered with books. Some of the books were leather clad first editions. I wondered if a woman had done the decorating it was soft, but had all masculine lines. I felt comforted in the office and felt as though I would be dealt with fairly. I was not sure how I knew that the dealing would be fair, but it was as if there was a voice in my head telling me that everything was going to work out fine. I had heard the voice in the past and it had never led me astray, I figured it was my noisy conscience or something.
“Miss O’Malley, can I get you a cup of coffee?” Taylor Goodman asked me and I was again drawn to his eyes and the small lines around them that showed me that he liked to smile.
“No, thank you. I am all coffeed out from my ride up,” that and the fact that just looking in his eyes made me quiver.
“Are you sure I can’t get you anything,” he asked with a small amount of suggestion to his voice.
“Water would be great.” I responded. I needed the water to quench my thirst and also to cool off from looking at Taylor.
Taylor walked out of the office and that gave me a chance to see him from behind and that looked as great as his front. The man was well muscled, my lust was growing and I would have sworn that he had a lusty twinkle in his eyes as well. I thought that he had to be married, but I didn’t recall seeing a ring on his finger. Just as I was beginning to daydream about Taylor and I on a king sized bed getting to know each other a little more he walked back into the room.
“Miss O’Malley, before I begin let me tell you that I do know about you. I know that you are currently uninvolved both on a personal and a professional level. You office is in the process of a merger that will most likely cause your job to be eliminated and I feel you have a great opportunity here.”
I had nothing to say, he was right, although I was not sure I liked him knowing that I was uninvolved on a personal level, but I guess that let him know that I was open to suggestions.
Before I had a chance to ask Taylor why I was the one who inherited the hotel and Madeline’s money he began to tell me a story about it; turns out that Madeline was a close friend of his family. She had told Taylor and his family all about father and the battle that had separated the family. He didn’t know what the battle was about either, she always just referred to it as “the battle” and everyone left it alone. Madeline had kept up with our family over the years, through friends, newspapers and private investigators. She knew that Father was still just as well off as he ever was, and that the family had never healed. Taylor showed me a whole file on information on me. There were pictures from elementary school, high school, and my graduation. She knew where I was currently working and made notes inside that she knew that I was unfulfilled and that she knew exactly what I needed. In the file were also several letters that she had written to me, but never mailed. All expressed her desire to get to know me away from Father, and that she knew that we would “get along famously,” as she put it. Honestly, even though I never met this woman I got misty knowing that this woman wanted to meet me and never got the nerve to contact me. I expressed this thought to Taylor and he stopped me in my tracks.
“Don’t get the wrong idea here. Madeline Ahearn was by stretch of the imagination a ‘weak, scared or otherwise timid’ woman.” He began
“Mr. Goodman, Taylor, to be honest with you; I have a job, a place to live, and no real desire to upset any of this for a hotel that has already been basically run into the ground by poor management. I would like to ask though, if you knew Madeline so well why did you let this so-called manager run her life’s work into the ground like that. I didn’t hear you saying anything about the man being in jail, or up on charges for any of this.” I folded my arms, hoping I looked opposing. Truth was, I was having a hard time breathing properly and my voice came out all breathy and sexy. I always do the wrong thing at the wrong time, I thought.
“Ms. O’Malley, Madigan, if I may be so bold, the man that you are referring to is in prison on charges of embezzlement, for stealing money from your aunt, which it turns out he has been doing for many years now. The Masterful Mohican has by no means been run into the ground. She just needs a bit of cleaning up. There are many who are more than willing to come back as long as Tom Pacheco is not running the place. Madeline has standing reservations for many families. Madeline thought that you were somewhat like her and that you would be perfect to run the hotel.”
Taylor was definitely boosting my ego, and heart-rate too for that matter, he sighed, and I sighed along with him “But, it seems to be that you don’t have the personality or the patience for dealing with the public at all. I can’t believe that you work in a call center talking with people on a daily basis.” There went my heart-rate and that ego boost too.
Wow, he honestly gave me a bit of a start. People don’t usually talk to me that way. I’m considered a bit of a bitch, but not usually this soon into a conversation. Maybe I came off like a petulant child, but who wants to run some roach-infested nasty hotel? Not me that’s for sure. Even if it would get me away from the parents and all the social engagements that they were forever dragging me too hoping to get me married off as soon as they could. So far, I had proved to be a tough catch. None of men that were brought around interested me, so I just gave up and turned tail as soon as I could.
Taylor Goodman stretched his hands wide on his desk and I felt that twitching inside again. I began to think, well, it wouldn’t hurt me to at least look at the hotel and see if it was something that I was interested in at all. If I were to listen to that voice that was in my head, it sounded like something that I would love to do, but I didn’t want anyone else to know that. It would be wonderful to be able to spend that much of my time people watching and working on my someday-to-be-written and published novel.
I didn’t really want Taylor Goodman, conceit personified, to know this, so I feigned disinterest. I leveled my gaze at him, hoping I wouldn’t have a heart attack right there in his office and said in my most businesslike tone, “Please take me to Masterful Mohican. I’d like to see my property.”
As we climbed into his pick-up truck I wondered what fate had in store for me. I didn’t have long to wait, we were only in the truck for about 10 minutes when we turned into a driveway and approached what I can only call a beautiful landscape. On the horizon you could see the amazing blue of the lake; it was offset by a classic New England style hotel on the water. There were several cabins of various sizes and a small house/office building adjacent to the hotel. The Mohican seemed to lay in its own small inlet or bay. There was not one room or cabin that wouldn’t have a beautiful view and that included the office building. I was entranced. I could feel it all over my face. I was grinning like an idiot
It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Taylor’s deep voice interrupted me and I jumped.
“Yes,” I nodded. “It’s gorgeous.” My voice had that breathy quality again, and this time I didn’t even feel embarrassed. I felt hypnotized.
All of the buildings were pained Cape Cod gray with pale pink shutters and doors. There were numbers on each of the cabins. Towards the side of the resort I noticed a swimming pool, volleyball/badminton area, horseshoe pit, and an area for campfires. We began our tour in the main office/house. Upon entering there was a desk and cash register, nothing notable, until I began to look at the walls. They were painted navy blue and were decorated with Native American masks. Through a door that quite honestly looked to be part of the wall we entered the living area of the building. Though it sounds quaint and trite, in that room, I felt that I was home. I felt that this place was built and decorated solely for me and that it was simply waiting for me to arrive.
Taylor Goodman seemed to fade into the background and I began to look around this unbelievable place. The small kitchen was done in sunflowers, the walls were a pale yellow and all the cabinets were a light pine. There were sprays of sunflowers hanging across the top of all the cabinets. All the accessories were sunflowers, I was in love. The next room I walked into was the living room. The walls were a butter cream with a cranberry accent wall. The couch had cushions that matched the walls and the chaise lounge was luxurious royal blue. There were several Native American dream shields, or Mandela on the walls also several pictures of Native American scenes my favorite being one that showed two Native American women standing outside an adobe home. The colors in the picture somewhat matched the walls, but the colors were more subtle. I wasn’t sure if I could see anything else, there was this nagging fear that I would wake up and find that this whole place was just a dream.
I walked into a Celestial Dream of a bedroom. The walls were a deep navy, the same as the outer office, but the rest of the room. I don’t know if I can do justice to the beauty that enveloped me at that moment. There was a king sized bed with a yellow organza tied along the 4 posters. There were stone wall hanging of the sun and moon. The bed clothes were also decorated with a bright sun and moon design. Could I comfortable here if my great aunt had lived in all this? Again, reading my mind Taylor said, “Before she went in for her surgery Madeline told a decorator to ‘go ahead with his plan’, come to find out she planned out the design years ago, and when she knew that she wasn’t coming back she set it in motion to make this into your home.”
I must have walked around in awe forever, or at least a half-hour. The place was gorgeous. It was around the same size as my pool house, but I felt almost invigorated there. Somehow, I knew that I could run this place, and I knew the kinds of people I would hire. And I would base it all of what they showed me on an application, and also what they showed me when I looked into their eyes. That is the real judge for me. My brain was already clicking around figuring how soon I could leave AmeriCable and move myself up here. Not only would I be taking care of myself, but I would be out from under the thumb of Father and Mother. I would be able to be a grown-up and only answer to myself. “Mr. Goodman, Taylor, I am in love with this place. I know I was a bit edgy before, but you might be also if you had just found out you had family that you didn’t know about. Not only has that, but to find out that a member of your family just left you a resort hotel. I am entitled to be a bit edgy.”
“Madigan, my father and I will be here to help you with whatever you need, but you should know that there are stipulations to the will. If you like I can go over them with you now.”
“Stipulations,” I got a bit nervous, “What are they?”
Taylor began, “The first is that you commit to at least one year here at the lake, you must live here year-round. You can’t go running back home at the first sign of bad weather. Second, you must give some of the old employees their jobs back, but of course you must approve of them. Third, you must invest 1/3 of the profits each season. Fourth, Madigan, you are a wealthy woman. Madeline has over $1.5 million dollars set aside in a trust account for you. The account will be yours on your 30th birthday, in the meantime you will have access to whatever monies you need to put the Mohican back in order and to have whatever you need. Madeline also wanted to state that she hopes that you can find true love here as she did when she was your age.”
I was rich. I owned what must be, or must have been a lucrative business, and I was well on my way to becoming the self-sufficient person that my parents didn’t think I could become without a man to take care of me. The stipulations were not all that hard. Although, I hate the winter, and I was praying that the Mohican was well heated, and I know that I saw a fireplace in the living room as well as the bedroom. I knew that I could do it. I told Taylor that I agreed to all the stipulations, and that I was ready to move in whenever the conditions began. We agreed that I needed to give two weeks notice at the cable company, and to give my parents the opportunity to adjust to my leaving the proverbial nest. Who am I kidding, they would celebrate. They would think that after all their prodding – I finally grew up.
On the drive home my mind was a swirling vortex of emotion. What broke up father’s family? Why did Aunt Madeline have a file on me? Could I run this hotel, how was Aunt Madeline so sure that I would take over her hotel, and that I would be able to run it as efficiently as she had, was Taylor married or otherwise involved. Oops, where did that come from? I didn’t care if he was married or otherwise involved, did I? No, I don’t think I do, and I matter of fact I told myself that I definitely didn’t care. Who’s fooling who, I was sweating just thinking about him again. Well, mother and father were disappointed that I was late for dinner, again, but they were somewhat relieved that I was taking some control of my life and trying out the resort manager/owner business. I think that they were thankful that I was moving from their home, so I could fall on my face, and then come groveling back, and work for Daddy as he has always hoped I would.
I went to Americable the next morning and gave my notice. After I did this I explained the situation to the manager in charge, and he was willing to give me my two weeks vacation now, so I could leave effective immediately. I went home and packed my belongings and my books, and my stuffed Alf doll that I have slept with since the early 80’s. Don’t laugh, he comforts me, doesn’t tell my secrets and doesn’t care if I don’t shave my legs every night. My Mother and Father most likely expected to have the time to give me a going away party, but I was not going to be the center of a gala affair.
I walked into the living room where my parents were sitting having there pre-dinner refreshment. My mother looked at picture perfect as always in a Donna Karan suit in a gorgeous blue and my father was in his usual shirt and tie. I was filled with energy after making my decision and I couldn’t wait to share what I was going to do with my parents.
“Mother, I wanted to come and tell you and Daddy that I am moving up to that hotel that I inherited from Madeline and I am going to run it, not sell it as you originally suggested.” The look on my mother’s face was priceless and I wished I had brought a camera with me.
“Madigan, you don’t know how to run a hotel, and you have never lived away from home.” Those were the first words out of my mothers’ mouth. “You should stay here and get married, not run off to the wilderness and run some hotel.”
“Honey, I am so happy you are going to do this,” The encouragement came from my father and was followed up with a hug.
“Clint, how can you encourage her. She doesn’t know the fist thing about running a hotel, or how to take care of herself.”“Lilah, just because you don’t know how to take are of yourself by now means suggests that our daughter can’t take care of herself. I think it’ll be the best thing for her.” My father defended me again.
“I think it is ridiculous,” My mother said with a pout.
“Well, I have news for you Mother, I am going to run this hotel and I am going to turn it into the best hotel I can,” I told her emphatically.
“I am proud of you Maddy,” My dad said, “And you let me know if you need anything.
I told them both that I was leaving immediately and although my mother continued to toss negativity my way I jumped into my Durango and blasted Poison all the way up the my new hotel.
***
The Mohican was as beautiful as it had been the previous day when I first saw it, honestly, I was surprised that it had not fallen into condemned status overnight, as that is usually my luck. I unloaded my meager belongings from the Durango, and sat down to decide what my next move should be. I quickly realized that there was no food in the house, therefore finding a grocery store became my next move. I jumped back in my truck and went for a drive to get to know that town that I was now to call home. Mohican Lake is definitely a summer town, and I was searching around pre-season, it was still early April and the town probably does not come to life until the end of May. That was my guess anyway. I found a small grocery store, stocked up, and left before the clerk, who was giving me a very strange look, could ask any questions.
I found my way back, put away the groceries and unpacked the gear that I had brought with me. I knew I would have to go back to the pool house and bring more stuff if I was happy here, but I could settle for now. It was still early in the after I had a bite to eat and finished putting my things away, so I decided to have a look around my new resort hotel. Directly outside the office to the left was a common building, it had games, a jukebox, tables, chairs, pool tables, pinball, and a kitchen. I figured it could be used for breakfasts or bbq’s. There was a large courtyard with horseshoe pits and volleyball nets, picnic tables and a few grill pits. There was a large in ground pool and hot tub with some chaise lounges as well as tables and chairs. There was a hotel building that looked to have about 14 rooms in it. To the right and left of the hotel were cabins of various sizes, I peeked in each one and they were all decorated differently, they all looked homey. Behind the hotel were 4 more cabins around a small courtyard. Further down by the lake there were 3 buildings, one was a boathouse, one for laundry, and the last was all boarded up. My mind started working and I thought that the boarded up building would be a great place for a small convenience type shop that sold all the things that you forgot to bring on vacation, shampoo, soap, sunscreen, etc. I also wanted to sell some Masterful Mohican gifts, and to showcase some of the local artists that otherwise wouldn’t be seen. I was very excited by the prospect. The grounds had been well cared for and simply needed some TLC and some flowers. My Great-Aunt had definitely poured her heart and soul into this hotel and the more I explored the more I hoped that I could live up to her expectations and made her happy. I wanted her to be proud that she chose to give this all to me.
First things I needed to do where to find out how much of a staff that I had and how much I more I needed; I also needed to look over the reservations for the coming season. As far as I was concerned, 1 was dependent on the other. In the office there were file cabinets, and fantastic pine desk, overstuffed chair, and thankfully a computer. I was hoping that my Great-Aunt has some of the reservation information on the computer, which would make it much easier for me than looking through all the files to figure things out. The database that opened before me exceeded any expectations that I had. It showed names, addresses, dates of stay, favorite rooms, how many years they had been coming as well as some basic information. I was pumped!! It looked like the cabins were already filled for the summer season. My guess was that Taylor, or his family had a hand in the database. Memorial Day Weekend, summer’s pre-season celebration was 6 short weeks away and I had cleaning, hiring, construction and possibly some firing to do before the opening.
My first call was to Taylor, or at least to his office. His very bitchy secretary told me that Mr. Goodman was not available, in no uncertain terms. It was instant hate for me. “Harrumph,” I thought, “He tells me to call if I need anything, and my first day here I call for help and he is to busy to talk to me.” Honestly, I worked myself into quite a lather cursing that man out. I sat back and grabbed a cigarette from my emergency pack, I’m quitting, but I have setbacks. “First thing I need is to rid my psyche of that man,” I said out-loud as I snuffed out the cigarette.
“What man,” asked a voice that must have belonged to the man who was just crossing into the office.
“Huh, what…..I was…….”, I stammered, caught off guard.
“ I can’t believe you tell me to call you, that you want to help, and the very first time I call some witch tells me you are unavailable,” I unsuccessfully tried to hide my embarrassment with anger.
“My secretary, Tiffany (0f course Tiffany I inwardly groaned) can be a bit overbearing. Luckily, I was near her desk when you called and since I was leaving I decided to come straight here to see what you needed.”
I again realized how good looking he was, and how stupid I sounded. He graciously accepted my apology with a small smirk. I was not about to tell him the first thing that came to my mind when he asked what I needed. My face flushed just thinking about it. I quickly explained to him my thoughts for the boarded building and he thought it sounded like an interesting idea and he also new a contractor that would be willing to do the work. He had somehow anticipated my next question about staff and had a report ready for me to look at; it was broken down to 4 main sections:
-current employees to retain
-current employees to release
-past employees to ask back
-past employees to avoid
It was a great report and I knew that it would help me out a great deal, and I thanked him for the work that he put into it. Taylor told me that the contractor would be there the next morning and I could tell them my ideas then and he would turn them into a reality. We went over a few others papers he has with them, payroll, room pricing and I needed to sign the ownership papers that my Great-Aunt Madeline had left in his care. He stayed and talked for about an hour, then I started yawning and he left reminding me that the contractor would be there around 8 the next morning and told me to make sure I was awake.
After Taylor left I went into the living room and curled up on the couch and looked through some papers that he had left. One of them was a sealed envelope with my name written boldly across the front….hmmmmm, I thought and I opened it.
Madigan,
if you are reading this letter then I have gone on to a better place, and you have accepted the challenge of bringing the Masterful Mohican back to the beauty it once had. I want to tell you that I am sorry that we never got to meet in person, but old wounds run deep and it would have troubled your father terribly had I tried to contact you. As Taylor has told you I have followed you life and I am so proud of the strong woman you have turned out to be. The Mohican is yours for as long as you want to keep her, but I ask that you at least try to last the year, for there are many surprises here for you and it could be the most amazing time of your life. Remember to always ask questions and not take all that you see at face value. Think of me now and then, and remember that all things are possible.
Love, your Great-Aunt Madeline
My eyes filled with tears and I told Aunt Madeline that I would try my best to make her proud. I watched some television, then set the alarm and went off to bed with Alf.
and here it is....
***
When I received a certified letter from a law firm, I’ll admit I didn’t really feel the need to run to the post office and pick it up. I mean certified letters never carry good news, and they usually end up costing you a lot of money. The next morning I grudgingly went to the post office and I picked up the letter sent by the law firm of Goodman, Smith and Meyers and I stuffed it in my purse to read later. I went off to work at AmeriCable where I was employed as a call center lead, which is a real fancy word for upper level grunt. I had slightly more responsibility than the average operator, but miles less than the regular supervisors. As a matter of fact, I completed the work that the supervisors deem to be below them. Rumors had been running rampant that our call center will soon be closing its doors due to a recent merger with a larger, regional cable company. Honestly, I wasn’t worried much about that. I could always go back to waiting tables if necessary. What bills do I have anyway? I live on my parent’s property, in the pool house if you must know. I have a private entrance, and I don’t see them unless I’m summoned. My pool house is small but comfortable. I have the necessary kitchen, living room, bedroom, closets and bathroom, and honestly if I was renting somewhere I would pay mucho dinero for a place as nice as the pool house.
I was on my lunch break when I decided that I had nothing better to do than to open the letter from the lawyers. With great trepidation I held the letter up to the light; I was unable to spy anything through the thick grain of the envelope and enclosed stationary. I took a deep breath made sure no one was around and tore open the offending piece of mail.
“Dear Ms. O’Malley,” the letter began Ms. O’Malley is me, Madigan O’Malley. “It’s with much sadness that we must inform you of the passing of Madeline Ahearn, your great, great aunt.” My what? I don’t know anything about a great, great aunt or that there was one who was still alive and had recently passed. The letter continued, “In her last will and testament, Miss Ahearn has left you’re her life’s work, a small resort hotel on the Mohican Lake in New Hampshire.” She left me what? Who is she? What is this all about? My brain was on full overload. I knew that I shouldn’t have read the letter until I was safely ensconced in my quaint pool house living room. I panicked over the letter immediately that then went barging into my manager’s office
“Yes, Madigan,” My manager Lois asked as she looked down her nose at me when I took a set.
“Lois, I need to leave, I am, um, I have a, I am, um.” I just stammered at her not really sure what to say,
“Madigan, I am busy here, what is the problem.”“Um, I need to leave,” I couldn’t give her an explanation because I wasn’t really sure what was going on.
Lois clicked her mouse a couple of times, looking, I assumed, at the schedule and the projected calls and the calls that we had received that day,” Fine, you can go.”
I yelled a quick thanks as I ran to my desk, clocked out and ran out of the office, not even stopping when my friend, Karen, started asking me what was going on and where I was going.
I called my mother as soon as I got into my car and told her that I needed to speak with her as soon as I could get home, “Mother I wouldn’t bother you if it wasn’t important.”
“Darling, as long as you can get here quickly we can talk. I have an appointment this morning that cannot be broken.” My mother told me in no uncertain terms.
“Mother, I promise you I’ll be there as soon as I can” I told her, I wasn’t kidding either; I was breaking the land speed record to get home.
“Fine, Madigan. I’ll see you in the sunroom when you arrive,”
I realized that my mother was going to be unhappy with my Harvard sweatshirt and ripped jeans, but for heaven’s sake, I was 26 years old, and I knew how to dress, and I knew what was appropriate and what is not for my job. She was going to have to deal with it. I had much more important fish to fry!
Mrs. O’Leary opened the door for me as I approached and told me that Mother would see me in the sunroom. Mrs. O’Leary asked if I would like some refreshment.
“No thank you Mrs. O., but you might want to have a glass ready for my mother when I am through with her,” the last part of this comment was muttered under my breath.
The unflappable Mrs. O’Leary caught it though, “Yes, Ms. Madigan.”
I walked out to the sunroom and glimpsed my mother standing by the French doors wearing a spring green linen suit and talking on the phone.
“Yes, Clint, I am aware that I have a fund-raiser. I am about to find out why your daughter demanded that I see her before I leave, I am hoping it is not another of her hare-brained ideas.”
“Yes, Clint, I’ll make sure Irene has a menu prepared for dinner tonight with the Larsons.”
Yes, Clint, I’ll make sure that Madigan is aware that the dress this evening is semi-formal,” As this was said my mother took a look at my current attire and rolled her eyes in disgust.
With that last dig in my direction, Mother hung up the phone and gave me her full attention. I wonder if she was really on the phone at all!
“Now Madigan darling, what is this all about?” Mother asked
I handed her the letter, which was wrinkled and damp with sweat, and began peppering her with questions before she could read the letter in its entirety. “Do you know this Madeline Ahearn?” “Are we related to her?” “What in this all about and why am I the beneficiary of this hotel?” Mother continued to check over the letter and make sounds like she may be interested, or at least curious about the letter. She didn’t respond to any of my questions, but went to the phone and dialed Father’s office number and began speaking in a hushed tone. I tried to move a little closer so that I could hear what she was saying, but one look got me sit back in my chair. I tired to move towards my mother again and her look got me to move to a couch on the other side of the room while she finished her conversation with my father.
“Now Madigan,” Mother began, “What I have to tell you may be somewhat of a shock”
Oh boy, what was she going to tell me, that I was adopted, or that I was kidnapped as a child and this Ahearn clan was my true family?
“Madigan, when you were young we had a wonderful relationship with some members of Father’s family. There was a falling out at some point, that I am not even truly aware of the origins of, but I know that from that point forward, your Father didn’t contact anyone from his family. Seems that Madeline was a favorite Great-Aunt of your father, and it was her company that he missed the most of all. Your father used to summer at Lake Mohican with Madeline each and every summer and those are times that he still talks about fondly. It was his love for her that made him adamant that your name be close to hers. Madeline attempted to contact your father several times over the years, but he felt that by talking to her, he would be giving in.”
“Mother, I know that we didn’t have much contact with Father’s family. I know that I have never heard him talk about anyone from his family. And why in the name of good sense, would this woman, whom I don’t know, leave me a hotel?”
“Madigan, darling, Madeline must have felt that by giving you the place that your father loved so much that this was her way of letting him know that he was always a part of her heart.”
“But, Mother, what am I going to do with a hotel?”
“Madigan, I know that you don’t like you job. Why don’t you call this lawyer and set up an appointment. See what the property looks like, what shape it is in, and the value of the bequest.”
“If you say so Mother, I’ll call the law office when I get back to my house, and I’ll let you and father know what I am going to do, when I figure it out myself.”
I stomped out to the pool house, in a conundrum to say the very least. Did I really want to get involved in all the politics of Father’s family? Did I care to find out about Great Aunt Madeline? Did I know thing one about running a resort hotel? Not really, not really sure, and definitely not. Those were the answers that I gave myself, yet as I walked in the house and set my things down I inexplicably found myself dialing the phone to call the law firm of Dewey, Cheatem and Howe, this was how I was planning on referring to the firm of Goodman, Smith and Myers. I thought that this had to be a huge mistake or a scam to get some money out of me. They were in for a great big nothing if they thought they could get anything from me, I lived paycheck to paycheck and had nothing left over for a scam.
The snob of a lawyer, Goodman I believe I was told his name was, told me that I was the proud owner of the Masterful Mohican Resort Hotel and Cabins, and also a large bequest of funds. As this lawyer was speaking I was doodling on a pad of paper, drawing flowers and hearts and when I heard bequest I started drawing dollar signs and a house. Hmmmmmm, I thought, a large bequest, could there be the opportunity for me to move out of Mother’s pool house?
I asked Goodman, or Cheatem as I decided he must be, if he could explain in further detail to me over the telephone. He stated that he would rather meet in person and show me all the details and also show me the hotel. I told him that I was not working the next day, anymore I thought, and asked what time I could see him. I was told that we could meet at eleven the next morning, for an early lunch.
I hopped in my Durango at seven the next morning, gassed up the truck and grabbed an extra large coffee for the trip. Mohican Lake was in northern New Hampshire, not quite as north Canada, but damn close. The ride took me about three hours; luckily I had left about four hours early, since I can’t stand to be late. I found the law office not as auspicious as I thought it would be. Actually, it was more Victorian Mansion, than cold steel and concrete. Mr. Goodman approached, or at least I hoped it was Mr. Goodman. Wow! What a good man, about 6’4” and from what I could see not an ounce of fat on him. And there was not suit on this man. He was in a tight fitting pair of jeans, and a hooded sweatshirt. Instant lust!! Snap out of it Madigan, I scolded myself, you know he will turn out to be a pompous, arrogant man.
We shook hands and I nearly swooned. Honestly, I have never swooned in my entire life, nor had I uttered the word swooned, until I laid eyes on him. I certainly hoped that Mr. Goodman, Taylor, thought that my hands were clammy and shaking from too much coffee and not from the jolt of sexual attraction that I just was struck with. He made some small talk, telling me about my great aunt and how she had been with the law firm since his father hung out his shingle over forty years ago. I assumed then that my great aunt had been quite old, ninety-two I found out. She lived on her own for her whole life and ran the hotel until the beginning season when a broken hip laid her up. One of the locals took over the hotel for the season, and nearly ran it into the ground without Madeline. Unfortunately, when they attempted the surgery to replace her hip she was too weak to withstand it. Taylor thought it was from a broken heart, since she knew that her hotel was quickly falling into disrepair. Not only that, but her reputation was failing as well. Many of the tourists that year were unhappy with the Masterful Mohican, the true name of the hotel. The “manager” actually took off with all the profits; basically he tried to run the hotel into the ground.
We were talking as we walked into his office was beautiful in a masculine way, all dark, warm wood for the furniture and a mossy green on the walls. It looked like a sanctuary, the desk was large, but not overly so and the walls were covered with books. Some of the books were leather clad first editions. I wondered if a woman had done the decorating it was soft, but had all masculine lines. I felt comforted in the office and felt as though I would be dealt with fairly. I was not sure how I knew that the dealing would be fair, but it was as if there was a voice in my head telling me that everything was going to work out fine. I had heard the voice in the past and it had never led me astray, I figured it was my noisy conscience or something.
“Miss O’Malley, can I get you a cup of coffee?” Taylor Goodman asked me and I was again drawn to his eyes and the small lines around them that showed me that he liked to smile.
“No, thank you. I am all coffeed out from my ride up,” that and the fact that just looking in his eyes made me quiver.
“Are you sure I can’t get you anything,” he asked with a small amount of suggestion to his voice.
“Water would be great.” I responded. I needed the water to quench my thirst and also to cool off from looking at Taylor.
Taylor walked out of the office and that gave me a chance to see him from behind and that looked as great as his front. The man was well muscled, my lust was growing and I would have sworn that he had a lusty twinkle in his eyes as well. I thought that he had to be married, but I didn’t recall seeing a ring on his finger. Just as I was beginning to daydream about Taylor and I on a king sized bed getting to know each other a little more he walked back into the room.
“Miss O’Malley, before I begin let me tell you that I do know about you. I know that you are currently uninvolved both on a personal and a professional level. You office is in the process of a merger that will most likely cause your job to be eliminated and I feel you have a great opportunity here.”
I had nothing to say, he was right, although I was not sure I liked him knowing that I was uninvolved on a personal level, but I guess that let him know that I was open to suggestions.
Before I had a chance to ask Taylor why I was the one who inherited the hotel and Madeline’s money he began to tell me a story about it; turns out that Madeline was a close friend of his family. She had told Taylor and his family all about father and the battle that had separated the family. He didn’t know what the battle was about either, she always just referred to it as “the battle” and everyone left it alone. Madeline had kept up with our family over the years, through friends, newspapers and private investigators. She knew that Father was still just as well off as he ever was, and that the family had never healed. Taylor showed me a whole file on information on me. There were pictures from elementary school, high school, and my graduation. She knew where I was currently working and made notes inside that she knew that I was unfulfilled and that she knew exactly what I needed. In the file were also several letters that she had written to me, but never mailed. All expressed her desire to get to know me away from Father, and that she knew that we would “get along famously,” as she put it. Honestly, even though I never met this woman I got misty knowing that this woman wanted to meet me and never got the nerve to contact me. I expressed this thought to Taylor and he stopped me in my tracks.
“Don’t get the wrong idea here. Madeline Ahearn was by stretch of the imagination a ‘weak, scared or otherwise timid’ woman.” He began
“Mr. Goodman, Taylor, to be honest with you; I have a job, a place to live, and no real desire to upset any of this for a hotel that has already been basically run into the ground by poor management. I would like to ask though, if you knew Madeline so well why did you let this so-called manager run her life’s work into the ground like that. I didn’t hear you saying anything about the man being in jail, or up on charges for any of this.” I folded my arms, hoping I looked opposing. Truth was, I was having a hard time breathing properly and my voice came out all breathy and sexy. I always do the wrong thing at the wrong time, I thought.
“Ms. O’Malley, Madigan, if I may be so bold, the man that you are referring to is in prison on charges of embezzlement, for stealing money from your aunt, which it turns out he has been doing for many years now. The Masterful Mohican has by no means been run into the ground. She just needs a bit of cleaning up. There are many who are more than willing to come back as long as Tom Pacheco is not running the place. Madeline has standing reservations for many families. Madeline thought that you were somewhat like her and that you would be perfect to run the hotel.”
Taylor was definitely boosting my ego, and heart-rate too for that matter, he sighed, and I sighed along with him “But, it seems to be that you don’t have the personality or the patience for dealing with the public at all. I can’t believe that you work in a call center talking with people on a daily basis.” There went my heart-rate and that ego boost too.
Wow, he honestly gave me a bit of a start. People don’t usually talk to me that way. I’m considered a bit of a bitch, but not usually this soon into a conversation. Maybe I came off like a petulant child, but who wants to run some roach-infested nasty hotel? Not me that’s for sure. Even if it would get me away from the parents and all the social engagements that they were forever dragging me too hoping to get me married off as soon as they could. So far, I had proved to be a tough catch. None of men that were brought around interested me, so I just gave up and turned tail as soon as I could.
Taylor Goodman stretched his hands wide on his desk and I felt that twitching inside again. I began to think, well, it wouldn’t hurt me to at least look at the hotel and see if it was something that I was interested in at all. If I were to listen to that voice that was in my head, it sounded like something that I would love to do, but I didn’t want anyone else to know that. It would be wonderful to be able to spend that much of my time people watching and working on my someday-to-be-written and published novel.
I didn’t really want Taylor Goodman, conceit personified, to know this, so I feigned disinterest. I leveled my gaze at him, hoping I wouldn’t have a heart attack right there in his office and said in my most businesslike tone, “Please take me to Masterful Mohican. I’d like to see my property.”
As we climbed into his pick-up truck I wondered what fate had in store for me. I didn’t have long to wait, we were only in the truck for about 10 minutes when we turned into a driveway and approached what I can only call a beautiful landscape. On the horizon you could see the amazing blue of the lake; it was offset by a classic New England style hotel on the water. There were several cabins of various sizes and a small house/office building adjacent to the hotel. The Mohican seemed to lay in its own small inlet or bay. There was not one room or cabin that wouldn’t have a beautiful view and that included the office building. I was entranced. I could feel it all over my face. I was grinning like an idiot
It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Taylor’s deep voice interrupted me and I jumped.
“Yes,” I nodded. “It’s gorgeous.” My voice had that breathy quality again, and this time I didn’t even feel embarrassed. I felt hypnotized.
All of the buildings were pained Cape Cod gray with pale pink shutters and doors. There were numbers on each of the cabins. Towards the side of the resort I noticed a swimming pool, volleyball/badminton area, horseshoe pit, and an area for campfires. We began our tour in the main office/house. Upon entering there was a desk and cash register, nothing notable, until I began to look at the walls. They were painted navy blue and were decorated with Native American masks. Through a door that quite honestly looked to be part of the wall we entered the living area of the building. Though it sounds quaint and trite, in that room, I felt that I was home. I felt that this place was built and decorated solely for me and that it was simply waiting for me to arrive.
Taylor Goodman seemed to fade into the background and I began to look around this unbelievable place. The small kitchen was done in sunflowers, the walls were a pale yellow and all the cabinets were a light pine. There were sprays of sunflowers hanging across the top of all the cabinets. All the accessories were sunflowers, I was in love. The next room I walked into was the living room. The walls were a butter cream with a cranberry accent wall. The couch had cushions that matched the walls and the chaise lounge was luxurious royal blue. There were several Native American dream shields, or Mandela on the walls also several pictures of Native American scenes my favorite being one that showed two Native American women standing outside an adobe home. The colors in the picture somewhat matched the walls, but the colors were more subtle. I wasn’t sure if I could see anything else, there was this nagging fear that I would wake up and find that this whole place was just a dream.
I walked into a Celestial Dream of a bedroom. The walls were a deep navy, the same as the outer office, but the rest of the room. I don’t know if I can do justice to the beauty that enveloped me at that moment. There was a king sized bed with a yellow organza tied along the 4 posters. There were stone wall hanging of the sun and moon. The bed clothes were also decorated with a bright sun and moon design. Could I comfortable here if my great aunt had lived in all this? Again, reading my mind Taylor said, “Before she went in for her surgery Madeline told a decorator to ‘go ahead with his plan’, come to find out she planned out the design years ago, and when she knew that she wasn’t coming back she set it in motion to make this into your home.”
I must have walked around in awe forever, or at least a half-hour. The place was gorgeous. It was around the same size as my pool house, but I felt almost invigorated there. Somehow, I knew that I could run this place, and I knew the kinds of people I would hire. And I would base it all of what they showed me on an application, and also what they showed me when I looked into their eyes. That is the real judge for me. My brain was already clicking around figuring how soon I could leave AmeriCable and move myself up here. Not only would I be taking care of myself, but I would be out from under the thumb of Father and Mother. I would be able to be a grown-up and only answer to myself. “Mr. Goodman, Taylor, I am in love with this place. I know I was a bit edgy before, but you might be also if you had just found out you had family that you didn’t know about. Not only has that, but to find out that a member of your family just left you a resort hotel. I am entitled to be a bit edgy.”
“Madigan, my father and I will be here to help you with whatever you need, but you should know that there are stipulations to the will. If you like I can go over them with you now.”
“Stipulations,” I got a bit nervous, “What are they?”
Taylor began, “The first is that you commit to at least one year here at the lake, you must live here year-round. You can’t go running back home at the first sign of bad weather. Second, you must give some of the old employees their jobs back, but of course you must approve of them. Third, you must invest 1/3 of the profits each season. Fourth, Madigan, you are a wealthy woman. Madeline has over $1.5 million dollars set aside in a trust account for you. The account will be yours on your 30th birthday, in the meantime you will have access to whatever monies you need to put the Mohican back in order and to have whatever you need. Madeline also wanted to state that she hopes that you can find true love here as she did when she was your age.”
I was rich. I owned what must be, or must have been a lucrative business, and I was well on my way to becoming the self-sufficient person that my parents didn’t think I could become without a man to take care of me. The stipulations were not all that hard. Although, I hate the winter, and I was praying that the Mohican was well heated, and I know that I saw a fireplace in the living room as well as the bedroom. I knew that I could do it. I told Taylor that I agreed to all the stipulations, and that I was ready to move in whenever the conditions began. We agreed that I needed to give two weeks notice at the cable company, and to give my parents the opportunity to adjust to my leaving the proverbial nest. Who am I kidding, they would celebrate. They would think that after all their prodding – I finally grew up.
On the drive home my mind was a swirling vortex of emotion. What broke up father’s family? Why did Aunt Madeline have a file on me? Could I run this hotel, how was Aunt Madeline so sure that I would take over her hotel, and that I would be able to run it as efficiently as she had, was Taylor married or otherwise involved. Oops, where did that come from? I didn’t care if he was married or otherwise involved, did I? No, I don’t think I do, and I matter of fact I told myself that I definitely didn’t care. Who’s fooling who, I was sweating just thinking about him again. Well, mother and father were disappointed that I was late for dinner, again, but they were somewhat relieved that I was taking some control of my life and trying out the resort manager/owner business. I think that they were thankful that I was moving from their home, so I could fall on my face, and then come groveling back, and work for Daddy as he has always hoped I would.
I went to Americable the next morning and gave my notice. After I did this I explained the situation to the manager in charge, and he was willing to give me my two weeks vacation now, so I could leave effective immediately. I went home and packed my belongings and my books, and my stuffed Alf doll that I have slept with since the early 80’s. Don’t laugh, he comforts me, doesn’t tell my secrets and doesn’t care if I don’t shave my legs every night. My Mother and Father most likely expected to have the time to give me a going away party, but I was not going to be the center of a gala affair.
I walked into the living room where my parents were sitting having there pre-dinner refreshment. My mother looked at picture perfect as always in a Donna Karan suit in a gorgeous blue and my father was in his usual shirt and tie. I was filled with energy after making my decision and I couldn’t wait to share what I was going to do with my parents.
“Mother, I wanted to come and tell you and Daddy that I am moving up to that hotel that I inherited from Madeline and I am going to run it, not sell it as you originally suggested.” The look on my mother’s face was priceless and I wished I had brought a camera with me.
“Madigan, you don’t know how to run a hotel, and you have never lived away from home.” Those were the first words out of my mothers’ mouth. “You should stay here and get married, not run off to the wilderness and run some hotel.”
“Honey, I am so happy you are going to do this,” The encouragement came from my father and was followed up with a hug.
“Clint, how can you encourage her. She doesn’t know the fist thing about running a hotel, or how to take care of herself.”“Lilah, just because you don’t know how to take are of yourself by now means suggests that our daughter can’t take care of herself. I think it’ll be the best thing for her.” My father defended me again.
“I think it is ridiculous,” My mother said with a pout.
“Well, I have news for you Mother, I am going to run this hotel and I am going to turn it into the best hotel I can,” I told her emphatically.
“I am proud of you Maddy,” My dad said, “And you let me know if you need anything.
I told them both that I was leaving immediately and although my mother continued to toss negativity my way I jumped into my Durango and blasted Poison all the way up the my new hotel.
***
The Mohican was as beautiful as it had been the previous day when I first saw it, honestly, I was surprised that it had not fallen into condemned status overnight, as that is usually my luck. I unloaded my meager belongings from the Durango, and sat down to decide what my next move should be. I quickly realized that there was no food in the house, therefore finding a grocery store became my next move. I jumped back in my truck and went for a drive to get to know that town that I was now to call home. Mohican Lake is definitely a summer town, and I was searching around pre-season, it was still early April and the town probably does not come to life until the end of May. That was my guess anyway. I found a small grocery store, stocked up, and left before the clerk, who was giving me a very strange look, could ask any questions.
I found my way back, put away the groceries and unpacked the gear that I had brought with me. I knew I would have to go back to the pool house and bring more stuff if I was happy here, but I could settle for now. It was still early in the after I had a bite to eat and finished putting my things away, so I decided to have a look around my new resort hotel. Directly outside the office to the left was a common building, it had games, a jukebox, tables, chairs, pool tables, pinball, and a kitchen. I figured it could be used for breakfasts or bbq’s. There was a large courtyard with horseshoe pits and volleyball nets, picnic tables and a few grill pits. There was a large in ground pool and hot tub with some chaise lounges as well as tables and chairs. There was a hotel building that looked to have about 14 rooms in it. To the right and left of the hotel were cabins of various sizes, I peeked in each one and they were all decorated differently, they all looked homey. Behind the hotel were 4 more cabins around a small courtyard. Further down by the lake there were 3 buildings, one was a boathouse, one for laundry, and the last was all boarded up. My mind started working and I thought that the boarded up building would be a great place for a small convenience type shop that sold all the things that you forgot to bring on vacation, shampoo, soap, sunscreen, etc. I also wanted to sell some Masterful Mohican gifts, and to showcase some of the local artists that otherwise wouldn’t be seen. I was very excited by the prospect. The grounds had been well cared for and simply needed some TLC and some flowers. My Great-Aunt had definitely poured her heart and soul into this hotel and the more I explored the more I hoped that I could live up to her expectations and made her happy. I wanted her to be proud that she chose to give this all to me.
First things I needed to do where to find out how much of a staff that I had and how much I more I needed; I also needed to look over the reservations for the coming season. As far as I was concerned, 1 was dependent on the other. In the office there were file cabinets, and fantastic pine desk, overstuffed chair, and thankfully a computer. I was hoping that my Great-Aunt has some of the reservation information on the computer, which would make it much easier for me than looking through all the files to figure things out. The database that opened before me exceeded any expectations that I had. It showed names, addresses, dates of stay, favorite rooms, how many years they had been coming as well as some basic information. I was pumped!! It looked like the cabins were already filled for the summer season. My guess was that Taylor, or his family had a hand in the database. Memorial Day Weekend, summer’s pre-season celebration was 6 short weeks away and I had cleaning, hiring, construction and possibly some firing to do before the opening.
My first call was to Taylor, or at least to his office. His very bitchy secretary told me that Mr. Goodman was not available, in no uncertain terms. It was instant hate for me. “Harrumph,” I thought, “He tells me to call if I need anything, and my first day here I call for help and he is to busy to talk to me.” Honestly, I worked myself into quite a lather cursing that man out. I sat back and grabbed a cigarette from my emergency pack, I’m quitting, but I have setbacks. “First thing I need is to rid my psyche of that man,” I said out-loud as I snuffed out the cigarette.
“What man,” asked a voice that must have belonged to the man who was just crossing into the office.
“Huh, what…..I was…….”, I stammered, caught off guard.
“ I can’t believe you tell me to call you, that you want to help, and the very first time I call some witch tells me you are unavailable,” I unsuccessfully tried to hide my embarrassment with anger.
“My secretary, Tiffany (0f course Tiffany I inwardly groaned) can be a bit overbearing. Luckily, I was near her desk when you called and since I was leaving I decided to come straight here to see what you needed.”
I again realized how good looking he was, and how stupid I sounded. He graciously accepted my apology with a small smirk. I was not about to tell him the first thing that came to my mind when he asked what I needed. My face flushed just thinking about it. I quickly explained to him my thoughts for the boarded building and he thought it sounded like an interesting idea and he also new a contractor that would be willing to do the work. He had somehow anticipated my next question about staff and had a report ready for me to look at; it was broken down to 4 main sections:
-current employees to retain
-current employees to release
-past employees to ask back
-past employees to avoid
It was a great report and I knew that it would help me out a great deal, and I thanked him for the work that he put into it. Taylor told me that the contractor would be there the next morning and I could tell them my ideas then and he would turn them into a reality. We went over a few others papers he has with them, payroll, room pricing and I needed to sign the ownership papers that my Great-Aunt Madeline had left in his care. He stayed and talked for about an hour, then I started yawning and he left reminding me that the contractor would be there around 8 the next morning and told me to make sure I was awake.
After Taylor left I went into the living room and curled up on the couch and looked through some papers that he had left. One of them was a sealed envelope with my name written boldly across the front….hmmmmm, I thought and I opened it.
Madigan,
if you are reading this letter then I have gone on to a better place, and you have accepted the challenge of bringing the Masterful Mohican back to the beauty it once had. I want to tell you that I am sorry that we never got to meet in person, but old wounds run deep and it would have troubled your father terribly had I tried to contact you. As Taylor has told you I have followed you life and I am so proud of the strong woman you have turned out to be. The Mohican is yours for as long as you want to keep her, but I ask that you at least try to last the year, for there are many surprises here for you and it could be the most amazing time of your life. Remember to always ask questions and not take all that you see at face value. Think of me now and then, and remember that all things are possible.
Love, your Great-Aunt Madeline
My eyes filled with tears and I told Aunt Madeline that I would try my best to make her proud. I watched some television, then set the alarm and went off to bed with Alf.
Saturday, January 6, 2007
My Little Drama QUeen
I wrote an article awhile ago about my 5-1/2 year old daughter and what a drama queen she has become, but it truly bears repeating. Riana can cry at the drop of a feather - and with all the emotion of someone who has just lost their best friend. Just this morning she was sent info fits of near hysteria because I asked her to clean her room, not immaculate mind you, but just to put things where they belong. She has a book case, drawers and a rack that fit all of her toys and them some. Inevitably though something is out of place and I have to ask her to clean up. This leads to crying which typically leads to my yelling and getting stresses out. This morning I chose a different tac. I just told her to clean it - I always give her a set amount of time and then I go and clean it myself. That of course leads to more hysteria. Oh, well. I am giving her extra time today and just letting her get it done. It's Saturday and I don't feel like having to yell today.
In the mean time, my three year old, Patrick is upstairs in his room playing. By playing I mean her is dumping everything he owns onto the floor to make his room look like some sort of a minefield that you wouldn't want to walk into if it was dark. He has some toys that are small enough to cause tripping and pain that will continue for some time.
I think I have come to the conclusion that I was try to keep the rest of the house clean and just let them keep their rooms however they want. This is a good idea, but the idea of me cleaning the rest of the house gives me hives!! I hate housework and I wish there were little elves or something that could come in and get it done when I was sleeping.
In the mean time, my three year old, Patrick is upstairs in his room playing. By playing I mean her is dumping everything he owns onto the floor to make his room look like some sort of a minefield that you wouldn't want to walk into if it was dark. He has some toys that are small enough to cause tripping and pain that will continue for some time.
I think I have come to the conclusion that I was try to keep the rest of the house clean and just let them keep their rooms however they want. This is a good idea, but the idea of me cleaning the rest of the house gives me hives!! I hate housework and I wish there were little elves or something that could come in and get it done when I was sleeping.
My Little Drama QUeen
I wrote an article awhile ago about my 5-1/2 year old daughter and what a drama queen she has become, but it truly bears repeating. Riana can cry at the drop of a feather - and with all the emotion of someone who has just lost their best friend. Just this morning she was sent info fits of near hysteria because I asked her to clean her room, not immaculate mind you, but just to put things where they belong. She has a book case, drawers and a rack that fit all of her toys and them some. Inevitably though something is out of place and I have to ask her to clean up. This leads to crying which typically leads to my yelling and getting stresses out. This morning I chose a different tac. I just told her to clean it - I always give her a set amount of time and then I go and clean it myself. That of course leads to more hysteria. Oh, well. I am giving her extra time today and just letting her get it done. It's Saturday and I don't feel like having to yell today.
In the mean time, my three year old, Patrick is upstairs in his room playing. By playing I mean her is dumping everything he owns onto the floor to make his room look like some sort of a minefield that you wouldn't want to walk into if it was dark. He has some toys that are small enough to cause tripping and pain that will continue for some time.
I think I have come to the conclusion that I was try to keep the rest of the house clean and just let them keep their rooms however they want. This is a good idea, but the idea of me cleaning the rest of the house gives me hives!! I hate housework and I wish there were little elves or something that could come in and get it done when I was sleeping.
In the mean time, my three year old, Patrick is upstairs in his room playing. By playing I mean her is dumping everything he owns onto the floor to make his room look like some sort of a minefield that you wouldn't want to walk into if it was dark. He has some toys that are small enough to cause tripping and pain that will continue for some time.
I think I have come to the conclusion that I was try to keep the rest of the house clean and just let them keep their rooms however they want. This is a good idea, but the idea of me cleaning the rest of the house gives me hives!! I hate housework and I wish there were little elves or something that could come in and get it done when I was sleeping.
Friday, January 5, 2007
Writing
Part of the reason I do all this writing is because I do truly want to be a successful novelist. I have already finished one novel and had a "supposed" agent for the last year. They did absolutely nothing for me the entire time except to have me spend money for a professional edit and a professional critique. Both of these things said that my book had a place in the commercial world, but due to my agents lack of work to find a publisher, nothing happened.
We parted ways last week and I have queried a few agents since then with little success and I am now thinking of going the self publishing route through www.booksurge.com after tax returns are done for the year and I see how we make out with that
We parted ways last week and I have queried a few agents since then with little success and I am now thinking of going the self publishing route through www.booksurge.com after tax returns are done for the year and I see how we make out with that
Free Lance Artilces
I have regularly publishing articles on www.triond.com for a very small additional income for our family. Here are the links to them if you would like to give them a read
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Noises-Behind-Me.12486
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Bribery,-It's-the-answer.12485
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Reversal-of-Fortune---Part-2.12459
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Reversal-of-Fortune---Part-1.12339
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/The-Santa-Card.11058
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Life-Saving-Chocolate.11056
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/A-Walk-in-the-Woods.10926
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Dinner-Reservations.10778
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Tony-The-Butcher.10768
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/High-Drama-at-Five.10591
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Marriage-Should-Be-Forever.10278
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Becoming-Peg-Bundy.10246
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Tenacious-Three.9097
http://www.healthmad.com/Weight-Loss/Diet-Pills-and-Me.9090
http://www.quazen.com/Kids-and-Teens/Fostering-an-Older-Child.9086
http://www.quazen.com/Shopping/Books/Loving-Books.8797
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Now-We-Are-5.8745
http://www.quazen.com/Home/Family/Parents-of-Five-Year-Old.8574
http://www.socyberty.com/Paranormal/Reading-with-a-Medium.8489
http://www.quazen.com/Home/Family/Our-First-Experience-as-a-Foster-Parent.8481
More links will be posted as I create more content. Please feel free to let me know what you think of them
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Noises-Behind-Me.12486
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Bribery,-It's-the-answer.12485
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Reversal-of-Fortune---Part-2.12459
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Reversal-of-Fortune---Part-1.12339
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/The-Santa-Card.11058
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Life-Saving-Chocolate.11056
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/A-Walk-in-the-Woods.10926
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Dinner-Reservations.10778
http://www.authspot.com/Short-Stories/Tony-The-Butcher.10768
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/High-Drama-at-Five.10591
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Marriage-Should-Be-Forever.10278
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Becoming-Peg-Bundy.10246
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Tenacious-Three.9097
http://www.healthmad.com/Weight-Loss/Diet-Pills-and-Me.9090
http://www.quazen.com/Kids-and-Teens/Fostering-an-Older-Child.9086
http://www.quazen.com/Shopping/Books/Loving-Books.8797
http://www.gomestic.com/Family/Now-We-Are-5.8745
http://www.quazen.com/Home/Family/Parents-of-Five-Year-Old.8574
http://www.socyberty.com/Paranormal/Reading-with-a-Medium.8489
http://www.quazen.com/Home/Family/Our-First-Experience-as-a-Foster-Parent.8481
More links will be posted as I create more content. Please feel free to let me know what you think of them
My kids
For those who are interested - we have three kids right now - Riana is ours she is 5 and our foster sons Patrick is 3 and Jason is not 6 months old. Months before Riana became a part of our life we had another foster daughter, Asianna (also pictured above)
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Tantrums and Attachment
My son is three and has a desperate need to be next to, or on top of me at all times. Since I am his foster mother, not his biological mother I am a bit lost with the entire “three year old” behavior. He has quickly become very attached to me and has a distinct need to check where I am constantly and would like nothing better than to sit on top of me for the entire day.
This presents a problem for a couple of reasons; the first is that he is not the only child in the home. His younger brother, who is now six months old, also lives with us, and I have a five year old daughter in the home as well. My daughter is in school all day so she is not here for him to play with. My three year old continuously comes into whatever room I am in and tells me “Mommy, I want to” or something else to that effect.
I am not sure if this is the normal behavior of a typical three year old, or if it is mainly because of the fact that he has been at my home for three months now and I have been a stable force in his life that whole time.
The needing me all the time I am somewhat handle, but lately he has been having tantrums on a grand scale. The start with a fake cry that could give my five year old a run for the Emmy Award I am going to nominate her for; the cry is followed by yelling, stomping and my favorite, screaming. These tantrums come for almost any reason and you can never tell when they are going to erupt. But I can tell you that I need to have them stop, because the screaming grabs the base of my spine and pulls until you give some kind of reaction.
My first impulse on hearing the tantrum is to scream myself; then I count to ten and go into whatever room he is in and tell him that the behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated in the house. This is met with one of two reactions, he either stops the fit, or he really throws himself into it and makes sounds that rattle the walls of the house.
I have no idea how to stop, or even curb these tantrums that are now happening a few times a day, but I think I am going to invest in a pair of ear plugs
This presents a problem for a couple of reasons; the first is that he is not the only child in the home. His younger brother, who is now six months old, also lives with us, and I have a five year old daughter in the home as well. My daughter is in school all day so she is not here for him to play with. My three year old continuously comes into whatever room I am in and tells me “Mommy, I want to” or something else to that effect.
I am not sure if this is the normal behavior of a typical three year old, or if it is mainly because of the fact that he has been at my home for three months now and I have been a stable force in his life that whole time.
The needing me all the time I am somewhat handle, but lately he has been having tantrums on a grand scale. The start with a fake cry that could give my five year old a run for the Emmy Award I am going to nominate her for; the cry is followed by yelling, stomping and my favorite, screaming. These tantrums come for almost any reason and you can never tell when they are going to erupt. But I can tell you that I need to have them stop, because the screaming grabs the base of my spine and pulls until you give some kind of reaction.
My first impulse on hearing the tantrum is to scream myself; then I count to ten and go into whatever room he is in and tell him that the behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated in the house. This is met with one of two reactions, he either stops the fit, or he really throws himself into it and makes sounds that rattle the walls of the house.
I have no idea how to stop, or even curb these tantrums that are now happening a few times a day, but I think I am going to invest in a pair of ear plugs
Starting Out
Blogging is going to be a whole new experience for me, but I am hoping to use it as a sort of web joural, or ever changing auto-biography. Hopefully, there will be times when people will stumble onto it and see some of the parenting woes, or publishing woes I am going through and will be able to take something away from it or even give me some advice of their own.....
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